Brokenness

Brokenness is one of the scariest things you could ever pray for. Asking God to break you is like asking God to pick you up and throw you at 100 miles an hour straight into a brick wall. When God first starts working in you, you’re flying through the air at 100 miles an hour. Life’s great! Then, all the sudden you’re laying on the ground begging God to save you because you cannot even pick your body up off the ground. It is when I am laying next to that brick wall that I learn the most about who I am and what an incredible God I serve.

God tends to have to teach me the same things over and over again because my sinful mind does not like to remember the great things He has done for me. Just recently, God reminded me, yet again, that I am a daughter of His Kingdom and that I am only complete in Him.

I have recently gone through a remarkable change in my life. A turn of events has caused me to lose everything I thought I had. Because of my “loss,” I have found the one thing I truly needed. I am so richly blessed beyond measure. I am a daughter of the King. I have a father, whose love is unconditional. I have a God who sacrificed His only son to save a sinner like me. I constantly fail Him, yet He forgives me and loves me over and over again. When I was a kid, I used to pray that God would make me perfect like Jesus, just for one day. I wanted to please God so badly that I would beg to be like His Son. Now, I realize that I am His daughter. God has adopted me as His child and I am now a part of His family! I can please Him everyday by living for Him and doing what He commands me.

I cannot help but smile when I think about how much God loves me. I was talking to a friend last night and I felt so silly because I could not stop smiling when talking about how much God loves His children. God has planned out my whole life and He is walking right next to me, holding my hand, through it all. Every single trial and blessing I experience I will experience with God right at my side and with His Spirit in me.

Brokenness is scary, painful, and perfect! It has taught me to look only to Christ. He is the only one who can fill the emptiness I feel in my heart. All I need to do is ask and He will give me the strength I need to live for Him and serve His Kingdom. I am His blessed daughter and it is only in Christ that I will find my true identity.

“I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me faithful, appointing me to his service.” I Timothy 1:12

As Christ’s saved one, I am His child, an heir to His Kingdom, and here on Earth to serve Him, seek His will, and love His people.